47th Post so far – time for change?

This is my 47th post.  After #50, I’ll decide if I want to keep doing this or maybe even pay for it.

My opinion today, how can I stop?  I have enjoyed myself too much.  I feel like I am finding my voice that has been silent too many years.

Maybe I should have kept some of my high school diaries.  I didn’t.  I burned them. I didn’t want to remember and I didn’t want anyone else to know what I knew, what I wrote.  That was 35 years ago or more.

Now, I don’t know if I care what people think.  Some things that have been happening lately, I wonder if it’s time to come out of my closet.  No, I’m not gay, not that I’m opposed to that or anything, but there’s a lot I just don’t vocalize to any or many people.  Does my family really know me?  Do I know myself?  Why do I sometimes feel like the black sheep?   Should I just start another blog, an anonymous one?

Am I that person who can stand by my convictions, my beliefs?  Do I think it will make a difference to me or the world?

Wow, I’m wondering if I should listen to The Best of Hootie and the Blowfish while I write?  Does it make me more maudlin or melancholy?

Whew!  It must be time for bed or something.  I haven’t been this emotional in a while.  Dang.

Well, only time will tell, but I feel somehow this year is a year for change, isn’t it?


4 thoughts on “47th Post so far – time for change?”

  1. Stick with it I say – Dolly Parton is still going strong – Wearing her Coat of Many Colours. For coat read quilt in your case, I know I ramble a lot!!!

  2. It’s hard to decide which way to go when blogging at first. You think you will play it safe and be bright and entertaining and then, before you know it, you are letting yourself out of the confines you put yourself in and spilling your guts! I’m rather enjoying myself too. Please don’t pull the pin now though, you are just starting. Try the one year goal. 😀

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